I met Deanne when I was a freshman in college fourteen years ago. I remember being in her kitchen for the first time and seeing a clipping up on her refrigerator that read “If you’re not living on the edge, you are taking up too much room.” To me this embodies Deanne’s life in a way because whatever she did, it was all out –100%. She was a committed wife, mother/grandmother, daughter, sister and friend. She served others with that same energy and enthusiasm. And although I am the one up here with the privilege of sharing this with you, this is really a compilation of the thoughts of all of the kids, including those of us lucky enough to marry into her family.
I am so thankful to Deanne for the many lessons that she taught us through conversations and her actions over the years that our Father in Heaven allowed her to spend with us before calling her back to continue her work on the other side of the veil.
All three sons in laws are so thankful to you for raising three amazing women. Through her example of what it means to be a mother and a wife she raised three great, righteous women (and two pretty amazing young men) who love the Lord and His children just as she did. Her relationship with Kurt was formed by a bond which was molded from mutual trust, spirituality, humor, and working together over the years that was a standard that we all try to live up to and strive to ensure such a strong bond in our marriages.
This atmosphere of peace was no accident, it was a result of your personality--your charity. Your home was a place of charity. I remember seeing crutches and eyeglasses scattered throughout the house when she, I mean Kip, was doing his Eagle project. She taught us what it meant to be charitable, like when she set up the company “Bags by Bernice” out of her home in Ghana which helps and sustains several if not many Ghanaian families through funds raised through your efforts. But even more important was her example of what it meant to have the pure love of Christ. Her gift of being able to see the good in everyone—so ingrained in her very nature—that we never heard her speak poorly of another of our Heavenly Father’s children—because that is how she saw everyone, as her own brother or sister, and she would do anything she was able to do in order to help. The story of the good Samaritan was a model of how she lived her life. She befriended everyone. she somehow knew the life story of the person who scanned the groceries at Albertson’s and the person who was bagging them. (Not to mention the people on either side of her in line). People liked to open up to her. Even when she was in for some of her final chemotherapy treatments, there were women who would come and sit at her side to tell her about their own problems (as if she did not already have enough to worry about) but she bouyed them up and bore their burdens with her own--often lamenting their hardships, which to us seemed insignificant compared to the ones she faced.
Another of her great loves was this world that our Heavenly Father created for us, and she passed that love on to her children, grandchildren and others around her. Yellowstone National Park will always be remembered by us as her outdoor escape. she adored the wildlife and sceneries afforded by the magnificent landscapes. she were also as tireless on hikes to the more remote destinations like Lone Star Geyser as she was in her service to others. Even more importantly, at least to the sons in laws, she had the magical ability to calm our wives after we would show up hours late from fishing trips. I remember having the entire family crowded into one hotel room after showing up a few hours late and it wasn’t long before you made some comment that had us all laughing at ourselves about spending all day fishing and not catching a thing. I recall several occasions of she would reassure us that if we were living off the land we wouldn’t starve—she would tell us the women would just have to figure out which plants were edible because we had learned we couldn’t rely on the men’s sportsmanship to provide fish and game for meals. And while we were off fishing, she was playing camp director--leading the rest of the troops around to see the bald eagles, the bison, and the bears and outfitting your grandchildren as YNP rangers. She loved the local wildlife as well and spent countless hours over the years refilling feeders which brought birds, ducks, porcupines and even the occasional skunk to her backyard. She also loved seeing the deer frequent her yard here in Draper, and it broke her heart when the young fawn died there. She loved this earth and all that our Father in Heaven created in it.
She also loved to have a good time. She was just fun to be around. She could do the moonwalk and didn’t shy away from demonstrating when her talents were called into question. Her sense of humor was great—at least we thought so because sometimes she was often the only one who laughed at our jokes. She especially loved humorous stories about the things her grandkids said and did in public on a daily basis.
Her athleticism was astounding. I have heard stories of her track and cheerleading days in high school. And she raised amazing athletes as well—including another female track star, two female soccer stars, and two male sports stars who do all of the above and won countless accolades for their sporting accomplishments on both the xbox and Nintendo gaming systems. I remember I thought that I was in good shape. I was still running track at BYU and we would come up on weekends that I wasn’t racing. We headed out with her skate skiing and it was only took me a few minutes to find out I wasn’t in “that kind of shape.” She loved to exercise including yoga—going with her daughters to classes where they would all return home laughing about one thing or another that had taken place during class.
She taught me firsthand what it meant to have faith. After she was diagnosed, she received a priesthood blessing blessing which rebuked the cancer. She, as well as the children she raised, immediately rejoiced with a faith so pure that you knew “things were going to be better.” I was astounded. Sure, I thought, but the priesthood holder is not a doctor, maybe he didn’t know what Stage IV breast cancer means, that the 5 year survival rate is not something to be rebuked. But what a lesson I had in store for me as I watched the years unfold and watched as she fit a lifetime of accomplishments into the additional seven and a half years of life that our Father in Heaven, through the power of the priesthood, granted her. I don’t know if she realized what she accomplished in those years? She fit decades worth of experiences and touched hundreds if not thousands of lives in various countries on several continents in her remaining years.
My mom buying beads. She loves African beads and spent many hours searching for good, old beads. Many times she would go alone to markets that even some of her African friends wouldn't go to. Photo won't rotate, so just turn your head!
Camel ride in front of the pyramids. Gotta do it.
My parents drove out to be with me when Cate was born. On the way home they went up through North and South Dakota so my dad could cross his last 2 states off his list. My mom wasn't feeling great, but she insisted that they had to do it because she knew my dad wanted to. She is my hero.
She has always been my best friend and I don't know what I'm supposed to do without her now.
I am grateful to know where she is, though, and that she is still close to me.
